There’s an old sea story about a ship’s Captain who inspected his sailors and afterward told the first mate that his men smelled bad …
The Captain suggested perhaps it would help if his men changed underwear occasionally.
The first mate responded: „Aye, aye sir, I’ll see to it immediately!”

O blonda suparata catre un tip:
– Voi scrie deasupra patului meu ca esti un prost! Sa stie tot orasul!

Mai degraba nelinisti culinare. Ati putea manca asa ceva? Eu nu pot sa mananc ceva care se uita cu ochisorii aia la mine. Voi?

Jennifer’s wedding day was fast approaching. Nothing could dampen her excitement – not even her parent’s nasty divorce. Her mother had found the PERFECT dress to wear, and would be the best-dressed mother-of-the-bride ever! A week later, Jennifer was horrified to learn that her father’s new, young wife had bought the exact same dress as her mother! Jennifer asked her father’s new young wife to exchange it, but she refused. ”Absolutely not! I look like a million bucks in this dress, and I’m wearing it,” she replied.

A burglar broke into a house one night. He shined his flashlight around, looking for valuables when a voice in the dark said:
„Jesus knows you’re here.”
He nearly jumped out of his skin, clicked his flashlight off, and froze. When he heard nothing more, after a bit, he shook his head and continued. Just as he pulled the stereo out so he could disconnect the wires, clear as a bell he heard:

Intrebare: Cum trebuie sa fie o femeie serioasa?
Raspuns: Femeia serioasa trebuie sa aiba sot si amant.
I: Credeam ca aia e o femeie adultera.
R: Femeia adultera are sot si mai multi amanti.
I: Credeam ca aia e o femeie usoara.
R: Femeia usoara are doar amanti.
I: Credeam ca aia e o femeie pierduta.
R: Femeia pierduta n-are nici sot, nici amant.
I: Credeam ca aia e o femeie singura.
R: Femeia singura e aia care are numai sot.

I need a medicine that costs 865 Euro / 1 gram. And I need 6g / month of that.
1 gram of heroine costs 100-200 Euro. And the sellers go to jail or are sentenced to death in some states. How come a medicine can cost more? Who are the criminals then?

Ziua de ieri a venit cu o surpriza minunata: mi-am regasit o fosta colega (mi-a fost chiar si sefa!), ce indraznesc sa cred … sa spun ca nu mi-a fost doar colega. Am cunoscut-o in cea mai frumoasa perioada a vietii mele, intr-un loc si-un timp care nu se vor mai repeta. Compania la care lucram nu mai exista din pacate (o multinationala – in vremuri in care ai nostri nici nu prea intelegeau bine conceptul de multinationala – cu atmosfera de firma de familie).