A salesman was dismissed because he was rude to a customer.
A month later the sales manager spotted him walking about in a police uniform.
– I see you’ve joined the force, John, said the sales manager.
– Yes, Sir. This is the job Ive been looking for all my life. Here the customer is always wrong.

An Irishman was walking home late at night and sees a woman lurking in the shadows.
„Twenty dollars”, she whispers.
Paddy had never had a hooker before, but decides what the hell, it’s only 20 bucks. So they hide in the bushes.
They’re going at it for a couple of minutes when, all of a sudden, a light flashes on them. It’s a police officer.
„What’s going on here, people?” asks the officer.
„I’m making love to me wife”, the Irishman answers sounding annoyed.
„Oh, I’m so sorry”, says the cop, „I didn’t know”.
„Well, needer did I – says Paddy – ’til ya shoined dat bloody light in her face”!!!

George Phillips, an elderly man, from Meridian, Mississippi, was going up to bed, when his wife told him that he’d left the light on in the garden shed, which she could see from the bedroom window. George opened the back door to go turn off the light, but saw that there were people in the shed stealing things.

In 2003, police in Warwickshire, England, opened a garden shed and found a whimpering, cowering dog. It had been locked in the shed and abandoned. It was dirty and malnourished, and had clearly been abused. In an act of kindness, the police took the dog, which was a Greyhound female, to the nearby Nuneaton Warwickshire Wildlife Sanctuary (go visit them), run by a man named Geoff Grewcock and known as a willing haven for Animals abandoned, orphaned or otherwise in need.

them), run by a man named Geoff Grewcock and known as a willing haven for Animals abandoned, orphaned or otherwise in need." class="tooltip" title="Pinterest">