Moses
A burglar broke into a house one night. He shined his flashlight around, looking for valuables when a voice in the dark said:
„Jesus knows you’re here.”
He nearly jumped out of his skin, clicked his flashlight off, and froze. When he heard nothing more, after a bit, he shook his head and continued. Just as he pulled the stereo out so he could disconnect the wires, clear as a bell he heard:
Social: mergate man
An Australian, an Irishman and a geezer from Margate are in a bar. They’re staring at another man sitting on his own at a table in the corner. He’s so familiar, and not recognizing him is driving them mad. They stare and stare, until suddenly the Irishman twigs: ‘My word, it’s Jesus!’